THE PEACEFUL EATING WAY PODCAST
Just This Once: Meeting the Seductive Rationalizer
Transcript
Hosted by Everett Considine. Recorded live in a Parts Work Practice from The Peaceful Eating Way™. Participants' names have been removed. This transcript was generated automatically and lightly edited, so it may contain small errors.
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Everett: Welcome to The Peaceful Eating Way Podcast. This is Everett. This is a live session with my Peaceful Living community about the Seductive Rationalizer, the permission-giving Part. There's some journaling and a guided journey, so keep a notebook nearby, and if you're driving, save those parts for later.
Everett: So welcome. I call this type of training a Parts Work Practice, and, I do these as part of, our continuity program called Peaceful Living, which is the thing that you can get access to once you do The Peaceful Eating Way. And I copied, where this Parts Work Practice is gonna be on the Seductive Rationalizer In Depth, which is one of the, one of, one of the Indulgers that we all have that, is really good to think about and learn about. So the Seductive Rationalizer. So understanding the Seductive Rationalizer. The Seductive Rationalizer is one of the most clever and convincing food Indulger Parts. It doesn't scream, beg, or throw tantrums. Instead, it whispers calmly using logic and soothing tones that sound like your own inner wisdom. That's what makes it so slippery. It often blends with you, making it hard to recognize it as a Part. Now, this Part is also the source of permission-giving thoughts. Permission-giving thoughts. This Part is a master of justification. It often appears when you're tired, stressed, bored, or feeling deprived. It offers compelling reasons to eat something that your self-led intentions might not agree with. "You've been so good. You need this to relax. Oh, it's just this once." These thoughts may feel like permission, but they're really attempts to bypass discomfort and avoid emotional tension. I was doing a session with a client this week and one of her, one of her big permission-giving thoughts is if she's eating out, So just a little more context is, this is This Indulger is one of the, Parts off the Peaceful Eating Parts Map. So it's one of the types of Parts that, gets us to indulge, And since we're really usually focused on food around here, that's really what I'm talking about, is, someone that's trying to eat a certain way, has made a commitment to eat a certain way, and then finds it difficult to do that all the time. And, this is one of the Parts that, can make it difficult, and because it comes in with such good rationales. But I was, but I was with this client, and one of the rationales that her Seductive Rationalizer has for her is if she's eating out at a restaurant that's seems very special or she's traveling, this Part tells her, "Oh, you're never gonna have another chance to eat this again for the rest of your life." And we were just, we were just reflecting how like that statement is one of the, one of the main things that her Seductive Rationalizer tells her And it got me thinking, that's the reason I wanted to go over the Seductive Rationalizer in depth again with you here, is it got me thinking that there really are maybe just one, two, or three kind of go-to rationalizations that we have. And I thought it would be really powerful. I'm gonna guide you through some, journaling prompts to help you get in touch with those yourself. For each of you to, like, really notice, like, what are the top, what are the top things that the Seductive Rationalizer uses? 'Cause it might even be just one or two things that it uses over and over again So this Part is a master of justification, and it often appears when you're tired, stressed, bored, or feeling deprived. It offers compelling reasons to eat something that your self-led intentions might not agree with. You've been so good. You need this to relax, or it's just this once. These thoughts may feel like permission, but they're really attempts to bypass dis-discomfort and avoid emotional tension. At its core, the Seductive Rationalizer isn't bad. It's trying to help. It might be protecting you from guilt, from internal pressure, or from the harsh voice of a Food Controller Part. It may be trying to soothe an exile, a wounded Part who's lonely, sad, or overwhelmed. In many cases, it steps in to offer quick relief, especially if other Parts of your system are feeling unseen or exhausted. And when the, when the permission-giving thoughts show up or any kind of craving, the thing I like to train my students is to really look at what you're feeling, what you're feeling, because those cravings aren't just coming up randomly. They're really coming up in relation to something that's going on with you And just due to the nature of trying to control addictive Parts, usually we don't, we don't ask. We don't ask what we're feeling when we break our abstinence or, go off plan, because a part of us gets so upset by it that's what the focus becomes, being upset and trying to control the craving instead of really compassionately, lovingly, asking yourself like, "Why is this showing up? What am I feeling?" Right? What am I feeling? This client, we were talking about some traveling she's gonna be doing and she's concerned about staying on her program while she's traveling. And, so we were talking about the Seductive Rationalizer and then I asked her, I said, "Well, what kind of stress do you feel when you travel?" And it was an, it was an interesting shift because we were talking about, cravings, trying to control cravings, having strategies, tactics. And again, she wasn't tuned in at all to what the emotional component of the trip is gonna be for her. And when she thought about it, she had to admit that she feels a lot of anxiety when she's traveling with this particular group of people, and she hadn't even up until that moment realized that's probably what has actually driven her poor food choices in the past What makes this Part so important to work with is that it's often high-functioning. It sounds smart. It's not chaotic, right? Like, a rebel doesn't sound smart, like when we're in our Rebel, right? We're like, "No, you can't make me." Right? But the Seductive Rationalizer really got good the rationalizations are good. That's why it's so seductive, right? It sounds smart. It's not chaotic. It may even seem reasonable until you look back later and realize it led you away from your deeper goals. The work here isn't to exile the rationalizer, but to unblend from it, to get curious and discover what it's really trying to do for you Again, this is a, this is a theme in doing Parts work around eating issues, right? As we get really curious as to what's happening here Right? Maybe you're, maybe you're, you're plant-based right now, or maybe you can't eat dairy because it really is really actually bad for you. And then suddenly you find yourself craving cheese or eating it, right? And then what normally would happen is we would get mad at ourselves, right? We'd be like, "God, why are you... Why do you harm yourself? You know you know cheese makes you sick. Why are, why are you trying to hurt yourself?" Right? And then, and then we start shaming ourselves instead of asking, "Why am I having this craving for this thing that isn't good for me? Like, what's going on? What, like, what was I just doing? What was I doing before this?" Like, "Oh, I was on that call with my mom. Oh my God, and I was so angry when I got off the call." Ding, ding. There it is. That's, that's why the Seductive Rationalizer is showing up, right? And then you, and then you have a, you have a moment to pause, and kind of separate from the whole situation. Maybe you end up eating the cheese, maybe you don't, right? But maybe you also know to be careful when you talk to your mom. Kind of prepare. "Oh, I'm probably gonna wanna get I'm gonna wanna have cheese," Or whatever. But again, it's like cultivating this sense of curiosity around our behaviors so we have this much fuller understanding of what's actually triggering the behavior rather than just, trying to use shame to rather than trying to shame ourselves into just stopping the behavior. So why does this Part show up? One of the things we know from the Internal Family Systems model is that all of our Parts have positive intentions. All of our protectors have positive intentions. They're trying to help. And if you're new to this model, the first time you hear that, you might be like, that, I don't know. That doesn't make sense. Like, I have Parts that are sabotaging me, that are trying to harm me. That Part that's making me eat cheese makes me sick." And it's, and it's true. They may have behaviors that are, that are harmful. But if you get in and look at the intentions, you'll see the intentions are they're trying to comfort you. They're trying to entertain you. They're trying to make you feel better in some way So here are some of the most common motivations behind the Seductive Rationalizer. And as I go through these, I want to really invite you to, write down the ones that sound familiar, right? So one is permission for pleasure. The Seductive Rationalizer, permission for pleasure. You deserve this. Come on, live a little. Often shows up when life feels overly responsible, rigid, or deprived. If we're feeling overwe- overworked and underappreciated, just the physical pleasure that we get from eating in a certain way, can really seem like you need it, right? You need some joy. You need some, you need some light. You need some color. Now, the thing, again, if you're starting to think about in like really in-depth around your behaviors and your cravings, you can start asking yourself like, what else could I do besides eat? Could I go have some fun? Can I go play my favorite little phone game for a few minutes? Like, what else could I do? So emotional soothing. This will help you calm down. This will help you calm down. Just one bite to take the edge off. Protect against anxiety, overwhelm, or loneliness. A lot of nighttime eating fueled by aloneness. Maybe someone that lives alone Emotional soothing. Avoiding guilt or shame. You didn't really eat that much. This isn't that bad. This is the way my Seductive Rationalizer works. It's always trying to, it's always trying to take the guilt away, from doing whatever I'm not I'm not supposed to do. You didn't really eat that much. This isn't that bad. Helps you escape judgment from other inner Parts, right? Rebellion against restriction. Nobody tells me what to eat. This is like the Rebel showing up in the Seductive Rationalizer. You're not going to live your life on a diet pushes back against the inner Food Controller or external rules Productivity or functioning, this will help you push through. You need energy to focus, often tied to Parts that equate food and motivation as fuel Avoiding vulnerability. Let's not deal with that right now. Food becomes a distraction from emotional discomfort or trauma. Softening harsh inner dialogue. You're okay, don't be so hard on yourself. Tries to comfort you when inner critics are attacking So the, this Part, the Seductive Rationalizer is, really useful. So yeah, the Seductive Rationalizer... So what I'm gonna invite you to do now is if you haven't, gotten out a pen and paper, is I'm gonna give you some journaling prompts so you can go deeper into this topic. So get out a pen and paper, and So why does... This is your first journaling prompt When does your Seductive Rationalizer usually show up? When does your Seductive Rationalizer usually show up? And this could be the time of day, the type of situation. It could be a kind of mood that you're in When does your Seductive Rationalizer usually show up? What are the phrases it uses most often? And if you can, write them in its own voice Like an example might be, "Come on, this won't hurt anything." Or like this thing that what this client was hearing, which was like, "You're never gonna have another chance to eat this." You're never gonna have another chance I had a client once that couldn't resist things that were new And so her Seductive Rationalizer is like, "Oh, it's new. We have to, we have to try this." But what is your seductive... And see if you can notice, is there one, two, or three things that it says the most? And it might be one thing that it uses over and over and over. But does anyone, would anyone like to share some of their insights or their reflections?
Participant: This is actually, my most active Part- and it is probably why I deviate or break my lines 90% of the time. It sounds so wise And it really tells me something like, "Well, you know you didn't get your normal lunch amounts, and you can have a fourth meal, so we'll just call this a fourth meal."
Everett: That so sounds like this [Dr. Seuss line]. Doesn't it, though? Right? It's just, it just- It's pulling out little random bits of flotsam and jetsam to create something that Is believable enough that you just go for it.
Participant: Yeah. Exactly. That's why it's my major one for breaking. Yeah
Everett: Yeah, and it's very powerful to, like, get these phrases down because what happens is when you hear the phrase, it instead of just buying into it becomes a little alarm that says, like, "Oh, the Seductive Rationalizer is here right now." It's like, "I see you. I see you." Well, and
Participant: The other thing it likes to tell me is that, "Oh, you're you've been so busy," And, "You have all of this stuff to do, and you don't have enough energy. So you need something for some energy." So that's another one of the
Everett: Yeah. Yeah. Well, thank you. Does that feel complete?
Participant: Yeah. Hi. Yeah, this is, apparently a very active Part in me, which this is my first time doing this one. So, my Seductive Rationalizer shows up when I'm lonely, when I've had a failure. Like on Sunday, I was doing a class, a workshop at church, and only two people came. I was hoping for six, and only two people came. So my Seductive Rationalizer said that I deserved a treat. And that this will That's a
Everett: Very common phrase that people hear.
Participant: Yeah. And that this will be the last time off plan before you start again, 'cause I have resumed. It's just this once, just this meal, just this event, or boredom. There's nothing else to do.
Participant: And, this Part helps me avoid loneliness and boredom. It wants for me entertainment, soothing, and relief. Yeah. And, my relationship with is I am blended with this Part. I have never separated from this Part as far as I know. I feel like it's me, right? I have little resistance to it because I believe it's logic, and I've been believing it since I was a little girl when I lived in a neighborhood where I was one of the eldest, and if there wasn't anybody to play with, I was just completely bazonkers. And at that time, I didn't know how to make friends, so I didn't invite people over. I was, like, between the ages of six and 12, and so it goes all the way back. It's got a long history
Everett: Yeah, but now you can start recognizing it. You're gonna start recognizing it all over it sounds like.
Participant: Yeah. Right? Well, it, I, it seems to be a very active Part in my life, yes.
Everett: Thanks.
Participant: Yeah. Okay. This was so good. Oh, my heavens. I have a really great little work between my Seductive Rationalizer and a Part that controls because, I have a strong manager. And one of the things that I've been realizing, and this is just really great for me for, to work on today, is that my manager, controller, whatever, it gets... Works really well. Like, I can keep my lines till the cows come home. Like, I'm constantly, consistently bright. I mean, I've stayed at this weight, whatever my, whatever weight, for like eight years, and it fluctuates right within the range. I'm just a very good range holder. You know what I... And it's like that, okay? You can hear it in my voice, and I control that. And this part of me doesn't like to write my food down because it's like one of the only comforts that I get is being able to choose what I feel like eating. It has that. It's like a little seduction that's like, "No, please let's not write our food," Because we do so many perfect, quote. We're so strict and so on board and so online. And then another thing it says, so these phrases were very... Oh, okay, for one thing, everything I eat is healthy, so it's healthy. Okay? Another thing is, I write all my food down. So, like, let's say if I don't, if, so, like, I have, I keep it in an app, a food app, because I like to watch my macros, and I really try to hit high on my protein. So one of the things it'll say is, "It'll be fine to have this because you write it down." It's like you're gonna put it in your... Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I do that. And I do. Yeah. Yeah. And then I watch my... So, like-
Everett: Right...
Participant: It has a bit of diet mentality that goes with it, and yet I stay- And
Everett: It has that Seductive Rationalizer logic.
Participant: It does.
Everett: Like, It's like, "Well, it's okay 'cause you write it down."
Participant: Yes. Yes. And it's healthy. And, oh, it's high in protein. Yeah. Whatever. Okay. So this is so great, and then, oh, a little bit of comfort is fine, and that's one of the places it finds comfort is in being able to choose what I want for the day kind of a thing, but I always have the guideline, the guideline, I'm following that. And this is really interesting. And one of the things that I was realizing this morning when, I was doing, like, a little bit of, prayer time with a couple of my friends is that it talks about never taking time to acknowledge or, feel good about, like, a success. Mm. And instead of feeling good about the maintenance that I'm holding and that I've been holding for a long time, but I've been holding it for so long that it becomes almost like what I do rather than being an achievement. Like, if you were learning to brush your teeth and you brush them all the time, then after a while when you're 67 years old, which I just turned it's like nobody's complimenting you for brushing your teeth. Now, maybe when I'm 80 they're gonna start complimenting me again, right? But now I've been holding my lines for so long, it's just like, "This is what you do. Don't be happy about it. It's just the way you are," Or something. Yeah. It's a little harsh. Mm. You can hear it. I can hear it in my voice when I say it aloud. So I'm gonna stop, but this is so very good, and I really am looking forward to journaling more about the patterns. So I'm glad that you asked that question- Mm so that I can, what are my top Seductive Rationalizer patterns? And if we're doing something that other people wish they were doing, but then we know that it's just the way that we are, then how are we happy about it? Because it doesn't feel like success, it just feels like the way life is. I don't know. I'm contemplating. I'm saying that aloud. That's the first time I've said that aloud. Yeah. I'm... Okay, that's good. Thank you so
Everett: Much. Well, and just a little reflection on that is I think what I'm hearing you say is that you don't celebrate enough.
Participant: I don't. Good. Just
Everett: In general. I'm gonna write
Participant: That.
Everett: Right? Yeah. Yeah, so that's part of the reflection, right? Like, Mm-hmm... Is this something I should be celebrating? And you can think about that. Yeah.
Participant: Yes.
Everett: You know what's fun to do, is to connect with people that do celebrate a lot.
Participant: Okay. And,
Everett: And like learn from them.
Participant: I don't know anybody- that does that.
Everett: Well, yeah, maybe you do.
Participant: Okay.
Everett: Yeah.
Participant: I'll ask. Thanks, Everett. You're the best.
Everett: Sure,
Participant: Sure. Okay. Hey, Everett. Thank you. Yeah, great session, just kind of bringing all of those ideas together. I have a question. Something I noticed that, in my phrases that I say to myself, the whole permission-giving thoughts, sometimes I'm using Mm-hmm and I put them down, and sometimes it's a we. It's like, so I wonder- If that's a blend or what that signifies in Parts work. So I will say something like, "Oh, boy. We can eat," And, versus, "Oh, I wish I could have that." And then there's an... Like, the other Part that I said to myself is, "Oh, I don't care anymore. Let's," Like there's a community eating this rather than my own self. What... Does that signify anything, or is that just my crazy-
Everett: Wow. I... That's amazing. I've never noticed that, but when you use those examples, like, I might use those same phrases. Like, why do we say we sometimes when we're talking about-
Participant: Does that mean I'm more blended or that I'm actually-
Everett: Well, I mean, if you're saying I, that's very blended.
Participant: Oh.
Everett: Right? 'Cause you feel like, I mean, that's why, you might... If you, if you did Parts work, you might say, "Well, part of me. Part of me wants this." That's, that's... We use that a lot, that phrase a lot to try and separate from Parts, right? When we're trying to, control behaviors that we're, of certain Parts. But yeah. We versus I. I've never thought about it before. But maybe I'll start to notice it now myself. Maybe I'll have some insight about it in a couple months or something if I start to track it.
Participant: You'll know when your insight shows up.
Everett: Yeah.
Participant: Okay, thanks.
Everett: Yeah. You're welcome. Anyone else? Have some thoughts about the Seductive Rationalizer.
Participant: Well, I definitely have the Seductive Rationalizer a lot, and, sometimes I pay attention to it. Sometimes it's more Impulsive Child stuff coming out. So I don't know.
Everett: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, thanks. All right. So we're gonna do a guided journey, and if you haven't done one of these before, you could also do this as a journaling exercise. The questions I ask you could just ask through journaling. Or you can do it as a guided meditation and kind of let me just guide you into connecting with and getting to know your Seductive Rationalizer- rationalizer Part. So I wanna invite you, if you wanna do this as a meditation, to close your eyes and take a breath And I want to invite you to reflect for a moment on was there, was there a top phrase that your Seductive Rationalizer says? Like something that they say more than any other any other rationalization. But I want to invite you to reflect for a moment and see if you can find the top, the top rationalization And as you start to settle into, like, picking one as the top And if you can't decide, that's okay. You can also just pick any one But I want you to reflect on them for a moment and see if you can remember the last time you heard that from this Part When was the last time you heard this particular rationalization? And I wanna invite to see if you can go back into the memory of this, of this moment And see if you can notice where do you hear the Seductive Rationalizer? Are they on your right or are they on your left? And if you can't tell, that's okay but you also might notice sometimes a Part really will just be on one side of us And go and see if you can notice what their voice sounds like. Like, is it loud and insistent? Is it soft? Is it calculating? Is it male? Is it female? What does their voice sound like? And if you were to give an image to this Part to imagine what they might look like This Part that just seduces you into making going against your plans Trying to get you some pleasure or some freedom or some Relaxation, some distraction. Who or what would this Part look like? What does your Seductive Rationalizer looks like? Like, what gender are they? Like, what are they wearing? How old are they What kind of posture do they have? What kind of expression do they have on their face? If you don't have a visual image, that's okay. Just stay with the felt sense or that sense of being able to hear them. But if you do see an image, I want you to notice how do you feel towards this Part in this moment? How do you feel towards them? And that's really just We're trying to see whether you feel open and curious or whether you feel something else, like maybe you don't like them or you wanna get rid of them And see if you can lean into some curiosity towards this Part Some curiosity And one of the things we do in Parts work is we dialogue with our Parts so if you're new to this, just kinda follow along and see what happens. But if you can really lean into that curiosity and then just ask this Part, how are they trying to help you when they show up? How are they trying to help you? And just ask that question and just listen and see what comes to you How are you trying to help me? And you might just know the answer. The Part might answer you it might answer you in a sensation or an image or a symbol And ask this Part, what does it ultimately want for you? What does it ultimately want for you? And if it says something positive that it wants for you, tell this Part that you appreciate its intention to help, that it, you appreciate its positive intention, even though you may not appreciate its strategy And if you're able to show some appreciation to this Part, just notice how the Part responds to that appreciation Ask the Seductive Rationalizer, like, what are they afraid would happen or what are they afraid you would feel if they didn't seduce you in this way? If they didn't show up What are they afraid would happen or what are they afraid you would feel? And then ask this Part, how old does it think you are? How old does it think you are? And just notice if it tells you, if it, many times our Parts still think we're very young, and so don't be surprised if it if it tells you that. But take a few minutes and just show this Part your current age Show this Part your current age And just notice how they respond to that And then ask the, ask the Seductive Rationalizer what are some of its favorite things some of its favorite ways to seduce you? Now that you're onto them, what are, what are their some of their favorite ways to seduce you? And see if you can have a sense of humor with them about this Maybe even the two of you can laugh together. And then ask the Seductive Rationalizer if they would be open to trying to help you find some non-food ways of relieving your stress, non-eating ways of relieving your stress, and just notice what they say, if they might be open to that And even give them a couple ideas. What are some other things they could suggest that you do besides eat? Is there another kind of treat, like a bubble bath or a massage? Could you give a, give a call to a friend or a family person that you love to talk to and really enjoy some connection? And ask them if they, if they work with any of your other Indulgers Maybe the Impulsive Child Indulger, maybe the Loving Parent Indulger, maybe the Rebel, the Caretaker A Productivity Fueler And just see if you might just be able to notice or make some notes later about, the other Indulgers that this Part works with. Usually the Seductive Rationalizer is the one that kind of starts you off track, maybe the Binger, right? They just sort of start getting you off track and then, another more serious Indulger will step in But it's so, it's so beneficial to really build a relationship with this Part because they're usually the first one to show up. When you're under stress or duress, this is the first Part that will show up to try and get you off your program into the food again. So if you can notice it here, notice it with them And then ask yourself, what am I feeling? Why is my Seductive Rationalizer... Ask that. Ask your Seductive Rationalizer, like, what are some of the top reasons that it shows up? What are some of the top situations that cause it to show up? And just take note of these as they show you And then really if you have a good visualization of the Seductive Rationalizer, really imagine them just being in this room with you like it's another person sitting there. And even if you can't see them, maybe you can have a sense of them But I wanna invite you to see if you can extend some loving attention to this Part And thank you for its intention to comfort you, its intention to help, even though you may not like the strategy. But this kind of self-love is so healing to our inner world, to appreciate our Parts And the fact that this Part is also now seeing you as an adult really could change also the dynamic that it has in your life right now So I wanna invite you to just send some loving attention to this Part and tell it thank you
Participant: Yeah. I have a question, Sure... As it's doing the work today. It's the Seductive Rationalizer, but how is that different than the sabotaging, the saboteur? Are they similar Parts or?
Everett: Well, so the, So the saboteur is from a more simplistic Parts model, the idea of the saboteur, right? Which is there's a Part that's trying to sabotage you, and you need to fight it. You need to recognize it and fight against it. And of course, in Internal Family Systems, we have a more sophisticated Parts model, where we understand... So it's still talking about that same Part, right? That someone in a non-IFS perspective would go, "Oh, that's your saboteur. You need to fight the saboteur," Right? And, but in Internal Family Systems, we see that all our protectors are trying to help.
Everett: So we see that Part doesn't actually feel like it's sabotaging you. It feels like it's trying to comfort the emotional pain that you're in. Yeah. It is trying to help.
Participant: Yeah.
Everett: And there's... That's one of the beautiful things about, the IFS model of the psyche, is it really is amazing to start to feel that everything inside of you is good. That everything inside of you is trying to help, right? Because normally, when we come to this work, especially if you have Parts that you feel like are sabotaging you, there's all sorts of self-loathing. There's all sorts of Parts that don't like other Parts, that Parts that are battling. And of course, that creates all kinds of, harsh emotions inside of us. And then what do we do with our harsh emotions? Oh, we eat over them, right? And so, the more self-compassion and love we can bring into our inner system. So it's just a different model. Yeah. Thank
Participant: You. Thank you.
Everett: Yeah, sure. Anyone else? Someone wanna share anything before we finish up?
Participant: Yeah, I have a question. Yeah. Because I got in touch with this, part of me for the very first time, and I actually love this Part very much. I don't wanna get rid of him.
Everett: Yeah. Good.
Participant: Now what do I do?
Everett: We're not trying to get rid of Parts. You're like, "He's so cute." He's so handsome.
Participant: No, he's, he's so... So it was a former waiter in a tux, erratic kind but in charge, right? He's been trying to help me feel better my entire life.
Everett: Yeah.
Participant: Right? And he's protecting a couple of exiles. I get all that, right? Intellectually, I get all that. And I just have a great deal of love for him.
Everett: Mm. Yeah. I mean, that is the thing. If we can, if we can listen to our Parts and let them tell us how they're trying to help, a lot of times love will, love and appreciation will actually show up, right? And then we have, then we have more love and appreciation in our field, right? And, so, and, A lot of times when we, when we really love a Part, many times it's also a sign that we're very blended with them.
Participant: Yeah, I'm very blended with this Part. Yeah. Absolutely.
Everett: So, the thing is you Yeah. You can unblend without and still love them.
Participant: Okay.
Everett: And that's kind of the process of Parts work itself. Like, if you... Like, now that, now that you see him as a waiter, right? Or now that you see him, like, that's a process of externalizing.
Everett: Right? And then the next time you hear that phrase in your mind, right, whatever the phrase is that's, like, the top one, you're gonna... You're probably gonna go like, "Oh, hi."
Participant: Yeah.
Everett: Right?
Participant: Okay.
Everett: And then you might, and then you might have a 70% chance of not following the suggestion.
Participant: Well, not following a food suggestion anyway, I guess. That'Food
Everett: Suggestion. Yeah.
Participant: Gotcha. Okay, great
Everett: This is one of those Parts that, you know, you can't revisit too often 'cause they're just always around. And then, and then they do get more subtle and more savvy as you get more aware, so. But they're always just trying to help.
Thank you for listening to The Peaceful Eating Way Podcast. If something landed for you today, take a minute to write it down before you move on. You'll find a free one-page practice sheet for every episode and the free Food Trance quiz at peacefuleatingway.com/companion.
